3 years. 6 years. And another 6 years.
Not very much of regrets.
Underwent a lot of changes.
And now my following 4 years.
Something that I hoped for
Somewhere that I want to be
When I'm trying hard to get there
I know I do not have the determination
And I wonder
Are these really the things that I wanted?
"Is this the life that you wanted?"
Your question struck into my head
I stretched out my arms, waving frantically
I don't know where to hold
I don't even know where to go
Why didn't I thought about going straight to my dreams
Perhaps I'm never brave enough
But why do I have the courage to stand where I'm standing now
I couldn't see the end to my situation
Perhaps it is not something that could be reached by me
I do not have what it takes
I do not feel the same as everybody else
(who's walking on the same path)
I couldn't fit in.
Or... is it that I haven't fit it?
No. I see the glass as half empty.
Sometimes I don't even know who I am.
As in, I don't know the person that I should be
which is the real me and which is not
I couldn't diferentiate
I don't know
For the first time,
the feeling is so strong, I can feel it almost everytime I breathe
(I feel like an Otome who don't know why did she attend Galderobe in the first place. )
Having too many destinations is not a very good thing
Because you'll get lost in the junctions.
But the only thing I can do is smile :)
5 comments:
Cuixia said...
You know what? That's exactly how I feel now. I don't know what I want in life. I don't even know what I really want to study, what my interest is. It's kinda sad coz I'm sorta brainwashed to always do the 'right' things, what people want me to do. In the end, what do I really like myself? I have no idea.
Life now to me is meaningless. Sigh.
16/10/06 4:30 PM
We are like humanoid robots, now are given some conscious to think, that's why we feel so... lost.
Yes, we were always made to do 'right' things, 'good' things, but never know what is the definition of right and good.
(I think) I have a destination to reach, but it seems like I always choose the wrong way, and standing on the wrong path.
16/10/06 10:33 PM
Yean said...
Hmm...
Lost...I feel the same but why am I feel so lost?
Why are we doing things people telling us to do? Not that we want to but have to. Guess that's the way it is since we're born in this country, this year and this space... But why am I? 'cos I chose it... that is I didn't choose anything for myself, that's why I'm doing what people want me to do...
I chose to be that way, but I don't know why, and I can't go back, that's why I'm lost...so lost...
19/10/06 3:09 AM
Anonymous said...
Freedom of choice is always restricted our surroundings and abilities. Believe me, even if you'd found your path, it might not be as easy as it seems to follow. I think we are meant to be lost.
15/11/06 8:48 PM
Perhaps. :)
4/12/06 6:32 PM
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